Last week my husband and I had our three oldest kids deliver a bit of social distancing joy! My husband said I should title this image “Helicopter Parents 2020”, haha! I decided to go with more of the survival mode aspect. I have been in desperate need of my own personal stress relief and knew many of my loved ones did too! What better way to provide a bit of happiness with delicious Krispy Kreme doughnuts and a bit of humor?
On our delivery day we spread our social distancing joy to seven different homes. It was completely worth it to see the smiles on their faces and hear their laughter! Several people commented that our visit was desperately needed. Being able to chat for a bit after the delivery made life seem slightly normal amid the Covid-19 craziness.
Just as a note, I am not an obsessive helicopter parent as these pictures suggest! This was purely for humor purposes. After each delivery my kids ripped off that gear as fast as humanly possible!
Inside story: life is never Pinterest perfect
Unbeknownst to me, my husband and I tried suffocating our eldest daughter for the the first six houses we went to. Each time she put the gas mask on she would exclaim, “I can’t breath! How do you breath in this dad?” My husband, who is a cop and the gas mask is part of his work gear, would say, “What are you talking about? It’s super easy to breath in. You’re fine.” Then any further complaints (which were actually surprisingly few) we would chalk up to her being dramatic (like most twelve year old girls are).
Right before our final delivery she complained a lot more than usual and my husband finally slid the mask on himself. He silently removed the mask and twisted off the filter. A muffled laugh lined with a speck of guilt escaped his lips, barely audible. I watched as he popped off a cap on the filter and then screwed the filter back on the mask.
“Have we been suffocating our daughter all this time?” I asked horrified.
My husband laughed and said to my daughter, “How in the world have you been breathing in that thing? That was aweful!”
Parents of the year award, right here.
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Once upon a time my sister gave me three little baby sunflower starts. I was excited and knew exactly where I wanted to plant them. They were going on the south side of my house, by the porch where everyone walking by could see. They were going to look amazing!
I weeded and tilled the ground, thinking only of the end results. In my haste, I overlooked some very important details. I planted these baby sunflowers between a western fence and a large shade tree to the east. In the beginning these little flowers grew strong, undeterred by the limited sunlight. By late summer however, they began to struggle.
The three sunflowers before they bloomed (except for the first sunflower with it’s sad blossom)
Normally I’m pretty good about paying attention to how much sunlight exposure a plant will get along with other conditions before planting. For some reason this time, I failed to look into those details as much as I should.
The first sunflower gave up trying to reach the sun. It seemed content to have only a few hours of sunlight midday when the sun was high in the sky. Once the sun dipped below the fence in late afternoon, the flower was completely cut off from any sunlight. It still tried to bloom, but soon withered before it’s flower could reach it’s full beauty. I couldn’t help but feel bad for the flower. Little did it know that in less than a foot it could have surpassed the fence and flourished in sunlight. It seemed to give up too soon.
The second sunflower had been planted the same distance from the fence as the first flower, but it seemed determined to find the light. It reached for the sun by what ever means possible. It bent and bowed and basked in the sun. It’s stem wasn’t straight and leaned to the side, but that sunflower blossomed! This flower worked hard and was persistent, never giving up! It was planted right beside the first sunflower, who never made it to the sun, but it decided it wanted a different fate than its companion. This flower may not be like other sunflowers which are straighter, taller, seemingly more perfect, but it was beautiful nonetheless.
Then there was the third sunflower. This sunflower grew straight and tall and also bloomed gloriously. After looking at the picture one might be inclined to assume that this flower did so well because it had the most light. Don’t forget the tree I mentioned earlier. It blocked all morning light, well past noon. This flower still did not get the recommended 6-8 hours of sun light per day needed by a sunflower, yet it thrived. This flower, which appears so strong and tall, could have struggled too, but it didn’t. It didn’t reach sideways, knowing it could reach more light. It simply waited until late afternoon- knowing the sun would come.
Our Master Gardener
I am a novice gardener. I did not consider that these poor plants might struggle. Unlike what these plants had, our Gardener is perfect! He is no novice, he knows how much light we need to grow to reach our full potential. Our Heavenly Father doesn’t make mistakes! Now this doesn’t mean that every single one of us has been planted in ideal circumstances. On the contrary! Our soil may be too rocky or not as fertile as other peoples. Perhaps there has been more shade and not a lot of exposure to the gospel. But our Gardener, our loving Heavenly Father, has made it possible for us to take root no matter the circumstances, regardless of how rough or shaded our terrain may be. He has provided the light if we only search for it. Don’t give up too soon, no situation is too hopeless! The light is there. Bend and reach, just like that second sunflower if you must.
Like these flowers, are we doing all we can to bask in the light of Christ? Our redeemer, the light of the world, is shining down on us at all times. It is up to us to choose and accept that light.
Some of us may be like the third flower, where following the gospel and reaching for the light comes naturally. These people have faith that light will always be there. Others may be more like the second flower, bending and reaching, having faith that the light is there but not always sure where to find it. Then of course there are those of us like the first sunflower, never finding the light and doing the best they can with what they’ve got.
There are many lessons I have learned in life, and one of them is that shade will come. There will be times where the skies are overcast and hope feels distant. Many of us have a hard time feeling our Heavenly Father’s love during these times and feeling the light we so desperately thirst for. I believe that none of us truly have a strong, rail straight stalk, just like the third flower. In reality we are all bending and twisting around life’s obstacles, being led by faith.
Just because the clouds are there, doesn’t mean the sun has disappeared. Christ is there, He is always there.
“Even though we may feel lost in the midst of our current circumstances, God promises the hope of His light—He promises to illuminate the way before us and show us the way out of darkness… I testify that with Christ, darkness cannot succeed. Darkness will not gain victory over the light of Christ. I bear witness that darkness cannot stand before the brilliant light of the Son of the living God!”
I have always loved sunflowers. They are so cheerful and bright! These flowers seem to exude their own light, as their heads follow the sun across the sky. When smaller sunflowers are cut and on display in a vase, they seem to brighten a room.
We have each been born with the Light of Christ within us. The discerning mind to recognize good from evil. A light to shine for others during their times of darkness. We are all unique and beautiful, despite our flaws.
Our beloved Father in Heaven has given us the Light of Christ. And deep within each one of us, a heavenly stirring urges us to turn our eyes and hearts to Him as we make the pilgrimage back to our celestial home.
Natural disasters are not subtle. They come sweeping in with an unpredictable fury leaving destruction, devastation, and chaos. That’s what I had always believed. Earthquakes, tidal waves, hurricanes, tornadoes and other natural disasters have always had widespread coverage in the news. I was familiar with these stories so when the hairline cracks appeared in the foundation of my childhood home during the spring when I turned sixteen, I wasn’t worried.
The street I lived on, which bordered a hill had slight changes to it’s original positioning and several of our neighbors had been noticing minor cracks in their foundations and shifting on their land. “The land is probably just settling,” was a phrase I heard several times. Specialists, like the state project geologist came out and surveyed the land. They measured the cracks with special equipment and looked at the five homes on our street who were effected. At first they didn’t say much, so I assumed everything would be fine.
I was wrong.
Those hair line cracks in the foundation, as subtle and inconspicuous as they appeared to be, started to separate at a rapid rate by late summer. One home after another was being condemned. The experts continued to monitor the land, but they couldn’t figure out what was causing the ground underneath us to shift. When our house was condemned, we were given 24 hours to evacuate.
About a week after we moved, a 10 foot drop separated the front of our foundation from the back of the foundation. The only home I had ever known was gone.
Here is my 15 minutes of fame! Front page of the newspaper sporting my pretty awesome overalls and carrying our cat, Mitzi out the back door of our home.
Almost two decades later and I can still remember packing up my house in a fit of adrenaline during the day. Into the silent night hours I worked with my parents. Boxes upon boxes left our house of things that you accumulate over a lifetime. We didn’t have much time to sort and since we had no where to go, most things got packed away and sent to a storage shed.
That was the first time I had ever stayed awake for two days straight, but I didn’t even feel tired. It was surreal. I packed fervently which kept my mind busy. I didn’t have time to think or let the emotions of what was happening impact me. The house creaked and groaned around us, as it was literally being ripped apart. I still remember the sound of my dad cutting the bolts that secured the back of the house to the foundation, to give us more time.
We were going to loose everything. The insurance company claimed the landslide to be, “an act of God” and said it wasn’t covered.
I emptied drawers.
I boxed up closets.
I cleaned out cabinets.
I hugged neighbors and childhood friends goodbye.
I packed up my bedroom.
I carried Mitzi from our home and hid her in the hotel we lived in for two weeks (what else could we do with a cat who also lost her home?)
I signed my name to a baseboard in my bedroom.
And I said goodbye to my home.
Our house was small and modest with a little carport and three big windows in the front that looked into my bedroom. From the outside it probably didn’t seem like much, but it wasn’t just a house. It was my home, a place where I could climb into my favorite tree for sanctuary in my backyard. A place that had the best Little Mermaid rock in the world. It had the bedroom I had shared with my sister where we played Malarky and Hu-watch-ee-foo, and did Christmas concerts with our stuffed animals. Sure, we had gotten older and I finally had the room to myself when my sister left for college. Life wasn’t perfect, but it was all I knew and I wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet.
But I had to.
The back wall of the foundation completely dropped and the front of the foundation stayed in place. See the top of the door opening in the back wall? That’s the door I was walking out of where the newspaper picture was taken.
Disasters in life
Everyone in life has disasters. Some are obvious and come rampaging in and the devastation that happens is very apparent to an outsiders point of view. I had always thought of a landslide this way, where tons of rocks, mud, and water come rushing down a hill crushing and engulfing anything in it’s path. This I learned isn’t always the case. Disasters can also be subtle, but just as devastating. I’m sure we can all relate to the current situation of a worldwide pandemic. This trial started with news stories of a virus in far away countries that ended up creeping it’s way to our very own doorstep.
At sixteen years old, my life had been turned upside down. I started my junior year of high school living in a hotel. The American Red Cross paid for the hotel to help my parents get on their feet and until we found an apartment to rent.
My parents took this time to evaluate more than just our living situation. After two weeks of living in the hotel they found an apartment, and soon after they told my sister and I they were going to get a divorce. This is when all the emotions I had held at bay swept in. Was it a surprise they wanted a divorce? Absolutely not. My parent’s rocky relationship was a known fact, it was more a matter of when things would end rather than if. Even though I knew it would eventually happen, it didn’t change the finality of it.
The only world I had ever known was literally crumbling in front of me. My home was gone, and my dad wouldn’t be living with us. It was all gone. Any illusion of my former life had been uprooted and destroyed.
Whether the disasters we face come rampaging in or come at us slowly and unassuming, how do we survive these events without crumbling?
Building Our Foundation
For several years after the landslide one question kept resurfacing in my mind:
How had our families foundation been as faulty as the foundation we built our home on? I’m talking about the personal stuff that went on within the walls of my childhood home.
So I ask you now: how is your foundation? How is the foundation of your family? Is it where you want it to be?
What if I told you that there was a different house on our very same lot that had been deemed unstable and was moved away before my parents built our house? As crazy as that sounds, it is true! The foundation of the old home was ripped from the ground and the land put up for auction. My parents were reassured that as long as they built the house further up on the lot and closer to the road they would not have a problem.
I’ve noticed far too often the heart breaking scene of people shaping their lives with faulty foundations. Foundations that have already been proven that they cannot hold and will collapse. People lost and suffering due to drug addiction, pornography, and other such things are all around us. We all have known someone in these circumstances, whether it be a friend or a loved one. Or perhaps it is you that finds yourself in a place in which you feel lost and desperate. These devices are tools Satan uses to weaken our foundations. Feeling hopeless is exactly what the adversary wants, but it’s a lie.
It is never too late to start strengthening our foundations. It doesn’t matter if you are in a good place now, or in the depths of despair. We only need to start with a prayer. It’s that simple.
Christ loves us and he will come swiftly to our aid and fill any cracks that threaten our foundation.
What hairline cracks are compromising your foundation? Your families foundation? You might notice small ones that have a simple fix. Others might be overwhelming to try to take on any sort of solution right now. But I urge you to start patching one crack at a time, focus on what you can do. The reality is that we can’t do it alone, and that is okay! With faith, our Savoir can patch any foundation that is lacking.
I urge us all to find those hairline cracks in our foundations. They can be so unassuming, barely worth a second thought. The reality, however, is they could end up tearing us apart. Satan knows our weaknesses, he sees where our foundation is failing. We need to prepare for the day when he intends to exploit those weaknesses. With a firm foundation, we cannot fall!
The storms and whirlwinds that plague us may come from choices we have made or from outside forces that are not in our control. In the end though, it doesn’t matter because the answer is the same. Christ.
And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
Matthew 7:25
All those years ago I decided not to crumble. I decided to hold my head up and overcome. I had faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. At times I barely felt like I was surviving, while other times I found peace and eventually joy! It is possible to find happiness, no matter how hard the rain is beating us down or what disaster we may face. You may not find it immediately, but don’t give up. This does not mean ignoring your sorrow and pain, (see Letting Ourselves Grieve) but finding hope and the Saviors light in the dark is always possible. He can ease our burdens and lighten the unbearable load we carry… if we let him. We must choose to focus on Christ and not the storm raging around us. When it seems as though our foundation is slipping out beneath us, turn to Christ. He will lift us when we need it the most.
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